So now I am writing you from Copenhagen after having to face
some tough and quite quick decisions regarding my future and health, having to
completely ignore important elements such as my present desires and plans. After
having received 2 different medical opinions about my weak and hurting knee in
November, another month had to pass by before I finally understood what I had
to do. After that I robotically bought the ticket, made all my preparations and
on the December 20th I was hugging my family in Copenhagen Airport
leaving behind my husband, my job and all our plans on standby.
In mid-October I suddenly felt a deep and abnormal pain
around my knee. That made me slow down my rehab to a full rest. 3 weeks passed
by and no improvement was noticed so I went ahead and had an MRI scan of the
knee. I had my doctor and a second have a look at the scan and was not at all pleased
with the different opinions. But I was left with the impression that time could
heal, so I cared and nursed for my knee with passion and dedication, my PT
passing me the energy, hope and tools. But when she one day told me that she
was running out of explanations and ideas, a heavy load was suddenly dropped on
me. This load fare surpassing the other bomb recently dropped on me when my doctor
told me to look for a desk job and forget all about the mountains, having spent
one year believing in my full recovery and return to the same. A belief he himself
had planted. The knee status changed that day from no progress, pain and aches
also to include an alarming lack of local help.
The end of the Maya calendar era is strangely coinciding
with all of these more or less unforeseen events making me feel somewhat driven
or even controlled by this odd energy. It is the end of an era and the
beginning of a new. I feel strange: Home and away at the same time. I can’t
shake away the sensation of having to draw a line again confronting all of my
decisions and my standpoint in life. Even though I am happy where I am I still
feel that the transition brought to me by these current and surprising events
is the beginning of something new. I am realizing that I would be a fool not to
reconsider my life and the path I have chosen, taking this new hand I have been
dealt into account - along with other sudden changes of events. To me this
certainly proves that life is ever changing and nothing is given – and that a
life journey is successfully completed if you know how to adjust your life
according to the unforeseen brought upon you.
Either way I am actually enjoying the naked Danish winter landscape
from which I have been separated the last 4 years when I usually am travelling
from springtime to springtime jumping between the hemispheres. It has been cold
and snowing and the days are extremely short. That strangely does not emphasize
my state of mind rather it is making me feel at home.
